Sex & Sexuality
15. I can purchase pornography that typically shows men defile women by the common practice of the "money shot.”
16. I can believe that causing pain during sex is connected with a woman's pleasure without ever asking her.
17. I have the privilege of not wanting to be a virgin, but preferring that my wife or significant other be a virgin.
18. When it comes to sex if I say "No", chances are that it will not be mistaken for “Yes".
19. If I am raped, no one will assume that "I should have known better" or suggest that my being raped had something to do with how I was dressed.
20. I can use sexist language like bonin’, laying the pipe, hittin-it, and banging that convey images of sexual acts based on dominance and performance.
21. I can live in a world where polygamy is still an option for men in the United States as well as around the world.
22. In general, I prefer being involved with younger women socially and sexually.
23. In general, the more sexual partners that I have the more stature I receive among my peers.
24. I have easy access to pornography that involves virtually any category of sex where men degrade women, often young women.
25. I have the privilege of being a part of a sex where "purity balls" apply to girls but not to boys.
26. When I consume pornography, I can gain pleasure from images and sounds of men causing women pain.
15. Who decides what is an act of defilement? In many porn production companies the actors and actresses have a say in what they will and will not do. So perhaps he means that it is defiling in the sense that money shots are meant to appeal to a male sense of dominance? If that is the case them what is the difference between the man doing other dominant things like choosing the sexual position? What makes a money shot an act of defilement but a woman tying a guy to bed and giving him a golden shower just "how they get down"?
16. I wouldn't call that a privilege. Guys like that are just being assholes and not paying attention to the woman they are with.
17. "I have the privilege of not being a virgin..."? This sounds like there is just some place out there that men can just go to to turn in their virginity or something. I would have worded it something like, "I can expect my significant other to be a virgin whether I am a virgin or not."
18. Mistaken or ignored? Yes there is a difference.
19. True...they will tell me that, "I should be thankful." and then drown out my complaints by reminding me that women can't rape men.
20. And women use sexist language like "puttin' it on him.", "making it mine.", "riding it like a bronco.". Yes both sets are wrong but there is not reason to act as if one does not exist.
21. I have to look it up but I'm pretty sure that polygamy is illegal for men and women in the US meaning that any man doing it is breaking the law. Not sure about the rest of the world but it is my understanding polygamy is still legal in other parts of the world for men only.
22. How is a preference in sexual partners a privilege? Now acting as if all members of the gender(s) I'm attracted to MUST conform to my preferences? That's a problem.
23. I agree.
24. I feel about the same way as I feel about 15 (about defilement and degradation) as I do here. But I do know that the majority of porn is geared towards men leaving women with much smaller selection of porn to choose from. For the most part men watch a lot more porn than women therefore most porn studios target men with their films. And would the "degradation" any less bad if it were older women (why bother pointing out that most of the women are young)?
25. True. I've always found it a bit unfair that a boy's virginity has been deemed worthless by society whereas a girl's virginity is the greatest thing in all the land.
26. Odd wording. The fact that men might get pleasure from seeing and hearing a woman in pain is not a privilege, that is just being a sicko. Now being taught that it is okay to get pleasure out of someone else's pain (while still imposing the idea that someone else is not supposed to get pleasure my pain) I agree is a privilege.
27. I come from a tradition of humor that is based largely on insulting and disrespecting women; especially mothers.
28. I have the privilege of not having black women, dress up and play funny characters- often overweight- that are supposed to look like me for the entire nation to laugh.
29. When I go to the movies, I know that most of the leads in black films are men. I also know that all of the action heroes in black film are men.
30. I can easily imagine that most of the artists in Hip Hop are members of my sex.
31. I can easily imagine that most of the women that appear in Hip Hop videos are there solely to please men
32. Most of lyrics I listen to in hip-hop perpetuate the ideas of males dominating women, sexually and socially.
33. I have the privilege of consuming and popularizing the word pimp, which is based on the exploitation of women with virtually no opposition from other men.
34. I can hear and use language bitches and hoes that demean women, with virtually no opposition from men.
35. I can wear a shirt that others and I commonly refer to as a "wife beater" and never have the language challenged.
36. Many of my favorite movies include images of strength that do not include members of the opposite sex and often are based on violence.
37. Many of my favorite genres of films, such as martial arts, are based on violence.
38. I have the privilege of popularizing or consuming the idea of a thug, which is based on the violence and victimization of others with virtually no opposition from other men.
37. How is liking violence a privilege? Now the fact that men are taught its okay to resort violence while women are taught they should never violent? That could be called privilege.
39. I have the privilege to define black women as having "an attitude" without referencing the range of attitudes that black women have.
40. I have the privilege of defining black women's attitudes without defining my attitudes as a black man.
41. I can believe that the success of the black family is dependent on returning men to their historical place within the family, rather than in promoting policies that strengthen black women's independence, or that provide social benefits to black children.
42. I have the privilege of believing that a woman cannot raise a son to be a man.
43. I have the privilege of believing that a woman must submit to her man.
44. I have the privilege of believing that before slavery gender relationships between black men and women were perfect.
45. I have the privilege of believing that feminism is anti-black.
46. I have the privilege of believing that the failure of the black family is due to the black matriarchy.
47. I have the privilege of believing that household responsibilities are women's roles.
48. I have the privilege of believing that black women are different sexually than other women and judging them negatively based on this belief.
39. I'm not sure I'd call that a privilege exclusive to black men since just about every walk comments on the "attitude" of angry black women.
40. Is this saying that I have the privilege of defining black women's attitudes without having my attitudes as a black subject to the same treatment? If that is what he is saying then I don't totally agree. The concept of "Angry Black Man Mode" didn't come from nowhere. I'm gonna have to ask Jewel about this one.
41.That is because the breakdown of the black family is being blamed squarely on black men. Or at least thats what I and am told.
42. A lot of that belief comes from people who are doing studies that link criminal activity among young men to lack of a father in the home.
43. That is obviously not limited to black men.
45. No. The belief is that feminism is anti-male. All males regardless of race or class.
46. Just like 41. Most of that blame is place on black men.
47. That is not limited to black men.
48. Agreed but as usual this is a two way street in which the other street is conveniently ignored.
49. I will make significantly more money as a professional athlete than members of the opposite sex will.
50. In school, girls are cheerleaders for male athletes, but there is no such role for males to cheerlead for women athletes.
51. My financial success or popularity as a professional athlete will not be associated with my looks.
52. I can talk about sports or spend large portions of the day playing video games while women are most likely involved with household or childcare duties.
53. I can spend endless hours watching sports TV and have it considered natural.
54. I can touch, hug, or be emotionally expressive with other men while watching sports without observers perceiving this behavior as sexual.
55. I know that most sports analysts are male.
56. If I am a coach, I can motivate, punish, or embarrass a player by saying that the player plays like a girl.
57. Most sports talk show hosts that are members of my race are men.
58. I can rest assured that most of the coaches -even in predominately-female sports within my race are male.
59. I am able to play sports outside without my shirt on and it not be considered a problem.
60. I am essentially able to do anything inside or outside without my shirt on, whereas women are always required to cover up.
51. Agreed but Mike Jones was certainly on to something with his line, "Back then they didn't want, now I'm up they all on me." Amazing how money makes people attractive...
52. Agreed and I can work outside the home as well as work inside the home and still be told I'm not doing enough.
54. Is this meant to say that when such emotional expression is not done while watching sports it is percieved as sexual? If so how is it a privilege to be limited in how emotional expression is deemed, "okay? Not sure what the line of thought is here...
61. I have the privilege of being a part of a sex where the mutilation and disfigurement of a girl’s genitalia is used to deny her sexual sensations or to protect her virginity for males.
62. I have the privilege of not having rape be used as a primary tactic or tool to terrorize my sex during war and times of conflict.
63. I have the privilege of not being able to name one female leader in Africa or Asia, past or present, that I pay homage to the way I do male leaders in Africa and/or Asia.
64. I have the ability to travel around the world and have access to women in developing countries both sexually and socially.
65. I have the privilege of being a part of the sex that starts wars and that wields control of almost all the existing weapons of war and mass destruction.
62. Agreed...I have the privilege of simply being killed on sight.
63. The wording of some of these items throws me off sometimes. I interpret this to mean, "I have the privilege of having most of the African and Asia leaders, past or present, that I pay homage to are members of my own gender." If that is so then I agree.
65. How is that a privilege? Must get clarification.
Well now you see why it took me almost two weeks to get this up (and I still have to sit and think of my next Song Title Link post). Part three shouldn't be this long since its the end of the list (items 66-94) but I do have to think of my conclusion.