Friday, November 6, 2015

Barely felt like it was my birthday today...

So I'm sure you've noticed that it's been a good while since I last posted and even longer since I was posting regularly.

Frankly a lot has been going on.

My job has been pretty draining and I still haven't quite adjusted. And it doesn't help that my work day was suddenly changed from 6a-3p to 8a-5p. Yes its only a 2 hour shift but that 2 hours means that I now have to deal with actual traffic when go to work and come home from work. Big change.

An aunt that helped me out a lot when my mom died passed away a few months ago. Hell her funeral was the first time I've cried a tear in over ten years.

I've slowly faded away from the gender discourse and have gotten back into gaming a bit. In fact some friends of mine got me a Hyrule Edition new 3DS XL for my birthday and I'm transferring data from my original 3DS XL as we speak. Interesting thing is I'm now on my second 3DS and I didn't buy either one. First one was bought by my girl.....oh yeah.

I got fucking married last week.

Yes been dating her 3 years and been living together for 2. She's helped me in my darkest hours and I know I want her there for my brightest hours. We actually got married on Halloween last Saturday. Even have a new nervous twitch that involves twisting my wedding ring (first piece of jewelry I've worn since I stopped wearing my high school ring almost 15 years ago.

So yeah that's when I've been up to.

When will I be back to posting? I'm honestly not sure. But when I do I'll let you know.

Stay frosty people.

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

So why only one charge?

I'm sure you've already seen it but in case you haven't video evidence has come up of Florida State University quarterback De'Andre Johnson getting into an argument with a woman at a bar.

After the two bumped into each other they exchanged words and those words culminated in the woman punching Johnson after which Johnson punched her back.

Now of course violence is wrong and we should avoid it when possible. But this is not a perfect world so it does happen.

With that in mind I don't support violence but at the same time I can't help but notice the resulting outcome.

Johnson has been charged with battery, indefinitely suspended from the football team and according to his attorney, "He is currently participating in community service, and faith-based programs focused on battered women, substance abuse, and the empowerment of children.". 

The woman.......yeah.......

There is no question that Johnson played a part in this and has to be held accountable and responsible for the role he played and he certainly went overboard in his response. However my questions are the same.

If "violence is wrong, no matter the gender" as people say then why is it when a man and woman are mutually violent only the man is held responsible?

If "violence is wrong, no matter the gender" as people say then why is it when a man and woman are mutually violent the story is almost always retold as "man hits woman"?

If "violence is wrong, no matter the gender" as people say then why is it when a man and woman are mutually violent the woman is treated as a totally innocent victim?

Spare me the attempts at saying I support violence against women because I don't. What I want to know is if violence is bad all about why is it that only men are held responsible for it.

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Burying it deeper and deeper...

So Axe deodorant appears to be at it again.

If you've ever seen an ad for Axe then you've most likely seen a desperate appeal to traditional masculinity. You know the "you're only it for sex with women" motivation that seems to be the only reason a man would clean his body type of masculinity. Convince boys and men that if they hope to have any sort of sexual contact with women they must buy Axe products.

Well there was that one time during the 2014 Super Bowl but that is a distant memory it seems.

This time they have released an ad with a picture of a woman trying on bikinis with a guy sitting in a chair with brown hair and two blonde braids with the caption:
"If you help her choose the clothes someone else will tear, she's seeing you with braids"
At the bottom there's the line, "Stop being a friend and start being a man." and there is even a (thankfully its not an actual site) URL.

Its 2015 and we still have companies selling products to men on the premise of it getting them sexual attention with women?

Its 2015 and we still believe that a male has to be either a man or a friend to women?

Its 2015 and we still tell a guy that if he isn't trying to get with a woman, he is a woman?
This is all wrong. This is the kind of stuff that supports that nasty mentality that if a guy acts a certain way and uses certain products he will be romantically successful and to do otherwise means to be a failure at manhood.

That kind of thinking leads to pain. Pain for everyone involved but mainly for the guys that will be led astray by it.

Methods of advertising that depends on old and dangerous gender roles need to die.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Domestic Violence Pop Quiz

1. When the video of Ray Rice knocking Janay out was made public what was your initial reaction?

Most people expressed outrage and precious few tried to say he was justified.

2. Ray J's girlfriend, Princess Love, has been arrested for allegedly beating him so badly she cracked three ribs and tore his ACL. What's your initial reaction?

Are you upset that a man was beaten up by his lover?

Are you upset that a woman committed an act of violence against her lover?

Are you wanting to know what Ray J was doing (in hopes of figuring out "what did he to do make her attack him")?

Are you ready to call for whatever company or industry she works in to kick her out on butt?

I think it goes without saying that if she did attack him she needs to be held responsible for her actions and needs to learn not to be so violent and most importantly Ray J needs whatever help he can get to make sure this doesn't happen again.

But more importantly, what was your first thought after reading about this?

Sound off in the comments!

(Also tip of my Fro to Mark Greene)

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

I Went to a Party Mom

I'm sure a lot of you are ready to go out and get crazy for New Year's Eve. It's fine to get crazy but be sure not to get too crazy. I would be so happy if there was no death or injury this New Year's. I found this poem a few days years ago in a local paper and it serves as a grim reminder of the damage one can do when they get reckless when drinking and driving.

I Went to a Party Mom

I went to a party, Mom, I remembered what you said.

You told me not to drink, Mom, so I drank soda instead.

I really felt proud inside, Mom, the way you said I would.

I didn’t drink and drive, Mom, even though the others said I should.

I know I did the right thing, Mom, I know you are always right.

Now the party is finally ending, Mom, as everyone is driving out of sight.

As I got into my car, Mom, I knew I’d get home in one piece.

Because of the way you raised me, so responsible and sweet.

I started to drive away, Mom, but as I pulled out into the road, the other car didn’t see me, Mom, and hit me like a load.

As I lay there on the pavement, Mom, I hear the policeman say, the other guy is drunk, Mom, and now I’m the one who will pay.

I’m lying her dying, Mom…I wish you’d get here soon.

How could this happen to me, Mom?

My life just burst like a balloon.

There is blood all around me, Mom, and most of it is mine.

I hear the medic say, Mom, I’ll die in a short time.

I just wanted to tell you, Mom, I swear I didn’t drink.

It was the other, Mom. The others didn’t think.

He was probably at the same party as I.

The only difference is, he drank and I will die.

Why do people drink Mom? It can ruin your whole life.

I’m felling sharp pains now. Pains just like a knife.

The guy who hit me is walking, Mom, and I don’t think it’s fair.

I’m lying here dying and all he can do is stare.

Tell my brother not to cry, Mom, Tell Daddy to be brave.

And when I go to heaven, Mom, put “Daddy’s Girl” on my grave.

Someone should have told him, Mom, not to drink and drive.

If only they had told him, Mom, I would still be alive.

My breath is getting shorter, Mom.

I’m becoming very scared.

Please don’t cry for me, Mom.

When I needed you, you were always there.

I have one last question, Mom, before I say goodbye.

I didn’t drink and drive, so why am I the one to die?

Author Unknown

Remember folks. Drink with conviction. Drink with caution. Drink with safety. Drink with responsibility.