Wednesday, November 28, 2012

The War on Men You Say?

Even for all the various oppressions, harms, -isms, and discriminations that are in effect in today's world I'm not a fan of claims that wars are being declared on certain groups of people. I didn't really care for the whole "war on women" bit (and for all that is holy no I'm not saying that there are no oppressions/harms/-isms affecting women, of course there are) and I don't care for the title of this Fox News article by one Suzanne Vekner. Or the article itself for that matter.

Yeah, "War on Men" it says.

It's late so I'm just going to pick out some of the odd bits in this article.
Believe it or not, modern women want to get married. Trouble is, men don’t.
What exactly is troubling about men not wanting to engage the in the old ways of marriage?

Supposedly the reason men are not wanting to engage in marriage is because, "Women aren’t women anymore.". Vekner goes on to say that men have not changed much since the sexual revolution due to not having a revolution that demanded it. True there currently no point in history where one can point and say that this is the point where men revolted. But that doesn't mean that change is not happening for men.
Armed with this new attitude, women pushed men off their the men have nowhere to go.
For the time being it may appear that men have nowhere to go but that is only because it's still relatively new ground to us. And to clarify as cool as it would be to say that women pushed men off the pedestal, a lot of men actually jumped off the pedestal. And by that I mean that we are fed up with the binding expectations that pretty much put us on a path of guaranteed gloom and doom.
You’ll never hear that in the media. All the articles and books (and television programs, for that matter) put women front and center, while men and children sit in the back seat. But after decades of browbeating the American male, men are tired. Tired of being told there’s something fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t happy, it’s men’s fault.
I have to admit there is truth to this. What else can you call it when you can take an issue where men/boys are most certainly getting a raw deal on and turn around and tell them that their gender has nothing to do with it or that since they are male the issue isn't that important or that so called male privileges override whatever harm is being done. When even those who call themselves progressives can with a straight face deny the things that harm men and/or bend over backwards to make sure they don't get too much attention (lest it take away from women) it makes sense there is only so much men are willing to put up with.
Contrary to what feminists like Hanna Rosin, author of The End of Men, say, the so-called rise of women has not threatened men. It has pissed them off. It has also undermined their ability to become self-sufficient in the hopes of someday supporting a family. Men want to love women, not compete with them. They want to provide for and protect their families – it’s in their DNA. But modern women won’t let them.
That's not fully accurate. The fact that women have made gains didn't threaten or piss men off (well not most of us). Those gains are good things to be sure but do you want to know what pissed men off? The fact that that even as women made those gains men are still being held back. And to make the cut even deeper those holding back attitudes are sometimes even coming from some of the very people support and praise the gains that women are making.

We aren't pissed because women making more money somehow undermines our ability to support a family and it doesn't keep us from loving women either. We're pissed because in this changing world we are being told that we should STILL be "the provider". Yeah we want to provide for and protect (but no it's not in our DNA, it's something we pick up along the way to manhood) their families but "provide for and protect" isn't limited providing from the outside (as in going outside the home to work and bring in money). It's not the gains of women that are interfering with that desire. It's the hypocritical  expectation that women should be free to change their ways while men shouldn't be.

I was just talking the other day about how even now men are still barely able to even giggle at a child's funny comment without being accused of being molester in waiting much less actually taking care of a child. Men are changing. There are people and forces that are opposed to that change. To the devil with those forces and people.

The rest of the article is nothing but bleating on about how men are slackers and women should embrace traditional femininity if they want to find marriageable men. Silly I know.

There's quite a bit disturbing here. First the idea that since men aren't abiding by the old ways means that something is wrong with us is absurd and it secondly it's pretty absurd to try to shape this into being women's fault.

This article smacks of an desperate attempt to undo the fact that men are waking up and are not wanting to run the old rat race anymore. Good for us I say. 

It's long over due for men to stop doing what others tell us we need to be doing and actually start doing for ourselves. If that means finding a woman to marry and settle down with fine. If that means getting cozy with the guy of his dreams fine. If that means being happy and single fine.