Friday, July 22, 2011

A comic book geek break

While I was looking the net today I came across this little gem.

Its an article on who why Batman is cooler than Captain America. Its not that the writer doesn't make any valid points but I am just enough of a comic book geek that I can't sit idly by and let my feelings go unheard. Although I think Batman may still win. And besides ComicCon is going down. Here goes.
ORIGIN
Batman: After his parents are killed in a mugging gone wrong, orphan boy Bruce Wayne obsessively trains in secret for years until he's ready to dress up as a giant bat so he can fight crime.

Captain America: After he is rejected as physically unfit to serve in World War Two, patriotic weakling Steve Rogers volunteers for a medical experiment involving a "super-soldier" serum and Vita-Ray bombardment that transforms him into the perfect warrior so he can fight Nazis.

Advantage: Batman. Rogers went above and beyond the call of duty, sure, but Wayne devoted his entire life, starting from childhood, to a compulsive desire to combat evil.
I don't want to take anything away from the fact that Bruce started at a younger age however I think there is one difference that need to be taken into account. Yes Bruce took on the desire to fight for justice at an early age but I ask. If Thomas and Martha Wayne had not been killed would we have a Batman today? I ask this because Steve Rogers straight up went headlong into the Super Soldier project in order to serve his country. No tragedy to spurn him, or was there? I suppose one could argue that if WW2 had never happened Steve Rogers would have never even had a chance to serve in the military (remember he was kicked out over physical requirements but was then later chosen for the Super Soldier project) much less become Captain America. I'm leaning towards tie.
SUPERPOWERS
Batman: None, technically. But through long, grueling training he's become a formidable fighter in prime physical condition. Also, he's incredibly rich, tech-savvy, and a wily strategist.

Captain America: None, technically. But the super-soldier serum puts him in peak condition, with strength and reflexes at the maximum for normal humans. He's also got plenty of real combat experience under his belt, and is an expert tactician.

Advantage: A tie. It's hard to say who'd win in a fight — Cap would probably triumph in a straightforward punch-up, but don't bet against Batman in the long haul.
Okay in Marvel vs DC a while back these two actually fought. In the end both dropped their trademark weapons (Batterang and Shield)...and Batman caught Cap with a surprise 1-hit KO punch. Don't get me wrong I love some Cap but Batman is not only a trained ninja but fights on a level of grime that goes against Captain America's battle ethics. Dark Knight gets the nod.
SECRET IDENTITIES

Batman: Bruce Wayne, playboy billionaire.

Captain America: Steve Rogers, army private.

Advantage: Batman. C'mon. One guy dates supermodels. The other guy gets yelled at by his drill sergeant.
Honestly you really can't even make the argument that Wayne is just living a privileged life while Rogers scrapes by considering that a lot of Wayne's money goes into his crimefighting and he is literally putting his life on the life just like Roger. I'll let this one go.
SYMBOLS
Batman: A bat, worn on his chest.

Captain America: The letter A, worn on his forehead.

Advantage: Batman. Cap's star-spangled costume, designed by the legendary Jack Kirby, looks pretty snazzy overall, but that A is seriously grade-Z.
Okay technically this is correct however when I think Captain America I think of the shield as his symbol and when you think about it like that Cap all the way baby. But since the A is his symbol I'll let this one stand.
WEAPONS
Batman: Batarangs, custom-made ninja throwing stars in the shape of his bat-symbol.

Captain America: A red-white-and-blue shield., made out of an unbreakable metal called vibranium. It's not only bulletproof, but can be thrown like a Frisbee, ricocheting off walls and pummeling his enemies.

Advantage: Cap. Batman has all kinds of impressive gadgets, but none of 'em are as cool as that shield.
I agree here. Plus Batman needs a whole fucking cave of gear to fight crime. Cap has only ever had his shield and maybe the odd gun.
ARCH-ENEMIES
Batman: The Joker, real name unknown, a psychotic serial killer and self-described "agent of chaos." He dresses like a clown in purple and green, with a pale white face and a permanently fixed grin. He's motivated by a morbid, twisted sense of humor and an obsession with Batman.

Captain America: The Red Skull, real name Johann Schmidt, a Nazi and terrorist leader personally trained by Hitler who underwent the same super-soldier process that created Cap. He dresses in black leather and wears a frightening crimson-colored skull mask. He's motivated by plans for world domination.

Advantage: A tie. Both villains are justifiably among the most iconic in comic-book history, polar opposites on the spectrum of evil—insane anarchy for the Joker, and brutal fascism for the Skull. I wouldn't want to meet either of them in a dark alley, or anywhere else.
On a global level Red Skull is the bigger threat in my book. However the Joker's unpredictability counts for A LOT. On some level you can reason with Red Skull. Well you might be able to reason with the Joker too but I'm not sure I'd want to go to that level anymore than meeting him in a dark alley. Tie.
VEHICLES
Batman: The Batmobile, usually portrayed as a stylish customized luxury sedan, but more recently as a military-grade urban assault vehicle tricked out with a secret escape module that turns into a motorcycle.

Captain America: Cap doesn't have an iconic vehicle to call his own. In the new movie, he'll ride around on an Army-issue motorcycle.

Advantage: Batman. And that's not even counting the Bat-boat, Bat-plane, Bat-copter, Bat-surfboard...
No contest.

Okay now that I have that out of my system back to your regular programming.
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