Sunday, September 19, 2010

I'm back!

Okay I've been out of the office for a few days. I had a job offer to consider. It would have been a boost of 13k/yr. however the job sounding boring and would have left me unhappy. And besides in the next year my bank is going to go through a massive conversation and I have a chance to be on the front lines meaning plenty to do, plenty to learn, and plenty of opportunity to make a name for myself at the company. Oh and the job I could have taken would have left me to pay for all of my training/certifications on my own while my current job will pay for it for me. I had to seek counsel and meditate long and hard. In the end while staying does slow down my plans to move I've concluded that when I do move I will be in much better standing (thanks to the training/certifications that my job is about to put me through). But now that that is over on with the business.

This week I got an email with the following joke in it.

One morning, a husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out.

She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins
to read her book.

The peace and solitude are magnificent.

Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat.

He pulls up alongside the woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am. What
are you doing?'

'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?')

'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her.

'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading.'

'Yes, but I see you have all the equipment. For all I know you could
start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'

'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,' says
the woman.

'But I haven't even touched you,' says the Game Warden.

'That's true, but you have all the equipment.
For all I know you could start at any moment.'

'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.

See what she did there? She pointed out that since he is male he has "all the equipment" to sexually assault her. Personally I'm of the mind that it takes more than a male reproductive system to sexually assault someone. I mean me and my male reproductive system have gone about 30 years without doing so. I'm betting there's more to it than that. And don't get me started on all those people who don't have male reproductive systems (that would be women) who sexually assault people...

And apparently threatening to make a false allegation of sexual assault is a valid defense against a game warden that's just doing his job. Yeah the woman was simply reading but he can't afford to take that chance. His orders are to keep people out of the restricted area. Oh it gets better.

The moral of this story is, "Never argue with a woman who reads." Never argue with a woman who reads because she might get mad and make a false allegation against you?

And this is a supposed to be funny?