Friday, September 24, 2010

Fathers don't count as human?

Tip of the Fro to Robert

I came across this today over at Glenn Sacks' place. Its a small movie that was made for entry into a film festival in Göteborg, Sweden sponsored by Amnesty International. The video goes into the hardships that Swedish fathers go through when comes to parenting, divorce, and custody. Its not a pretty picture.

However there is one thing that I do disagree with. At one point in the video the interview asks a father where he thinks the problems started. He answers that it started around 40 years ago around the time of the feminist movement. I don't think that is case for two reasons. First the presumption that men make bad and unfit parents and women are the perfection of parenting based on their gender predates feminism. And secondly I won't give feminist the satisfaction of giving them something else to cry about being blamed for. HOWEVER while feminists didn't start those presumptions there are those among them that won't think twice about leaning on them to push their own agendas.

But anyway you would think that there would be no problem airing it at a film festival, especially one sponsored by an organization that focuses on human rights. I guess not.
It was scheduled to be screened at the festival and the young people who made it were invited to see their creation shown to the public. But they never did. Amnesty International pulled the plug on the film at the last minute and removed it from its website.
I hope I'm wrong but it looks like in the eyes of AI fathers don't count as humans.

We have seen time, time, and time again how fathers rights get trampled on on a regular basis all over the world. What bugs me out is that people will in one moment support pushing fathers out of their children's lives and in the next go on and on crying about how fathers need to be in their children's lives. It can't be both ways. Either fathers should able to be in their kids lives or they shouldn't. Well obviously they should be but even if you think they don't then dammit at least be consistent.

Boys/Men are raised from the get go to believe that because of their gender they are not and cannot be fit parents. After years of having that drilled into your head it is any surprise they don't stay around to be in their kids lives? It amazes me that the people who complain about men not being around in their kids lives will bend reality to twist that notion that male=bad parent into males being raised to think they shouldn't be responsible for their kids (I suppose it serves the purpose of making women look like the only victims of the equation...).

For ages societies may have needed men to not be in their kids lives as much because they had other responsibilities but those days are numbered. At this point there is only one reason for people to think that dads shouldn't be with their kids and that's because simply do not want men to be with their kids. But I guess since the gender roles have changed up to the point where a dad can actually spend time with the kids new roadblocks have to be put up. False allegations, fly by night adoptions, and the occasional international kidnapping are the tools for building those roadblocks now.

And I can imagine its hard for women who enjoy the privilege of being assumed to be good parents because of their gender (but I'll bet there's women out there that hate that presumption) and they don't the idea of being taken down from their pedestal but they're just gonna have to give it up. There is no way we can expect equality between the genders while at the same time trying to maintain selective privileges.

Men have to change, women have to change, and society has to change when it comes to parenting because this whole deal of assessing one's fitness as a parent on nothing but gender is not right and cannot last.

1 comment:

Paul said...

I'm not so sure he actually "blamed" feminism. At most he placed feminism as the first domino to fall that led to this situation. What I believe he did blame was the lack of change to the stereotype that only women make good parents