Monday, January 5, 2009

Why yes, women can rape men.

Just like my last post this one is also talking about rape so the same (possibly unnecessary) warning applies.


Okay the folks over at Feminist Critics are having a discussion about rape. A poster by the name of DaisyDeadHead ask a few questions:


Okay, full disclosure: I have trouble understanding how women can rape men and I am going to have to get someone to explain to me how this can happen. Do not yell at me for not knowing or getting it. I am asking politely. I figure this is the place to ask, yes?

Do you mean overcoming men physically? How would a woman force a man to have an erection and penetrate them? Is there a thread here I should be reading? Link?

Or are you defining rape in another way?

I’ve been married three times, and in my observation, when a man is uninterested or tired or whatever, well, that’s that. ;)


Well since that thread started as an off topic post from another discussion I'll be nice and take a moment to answer her question here (even though a response post has already shown up on the site).

Do you mean overcoming men physically?

Bear in mind that on the average men are more powerful than women. Based on the definition of average alone it is evident that there are women out there that are more powerful some men. So regardless of how often it does happen the fact of the matter is it can and does happen.

How would a woman force a man to have an erection and penetrate them?

First it would be worth to say that it is much easier than one thinks for a man to develop an erection. That does not mean that "he really wants it" (which is just a cultural misconception) anymore than a woman that gets wet (or perhaps orgasm if that happens) when she gets raped. The belief that every erection that a man gets is intentional is wrong. I've gotten erections by simply having my pants rub against my penis the wrong way, when I'm washing my body in the shower, and yes there is truth to morning wood.

Also bear in mind that physical force is not the only way to rape a person. You think women don't know how to use drugs (Edit: and alcohol)? You think women don't know how to silence a man by asking him "If you don't consent I'll scream rape. Who do you think they'll believe?". There is no amount of "male privilege" that will convince any man that in such a he said she said he would have a fair chance. (Edit: And no male privilege does not translate into all "He said/She said" situations going his way.)

Or are you defining rape in another way?

There is no need to define rape in another manner. Rape is when someone is forced to have sex against their will or has sex when they are by some manner unable to consent.

So to answer your question Daisy yes it is possible for a woman to rape a man. It may not be under the same circumstances or with the same methods but it is most certainly possible

3 comments:

Ender said...

"There is no amount of "male privilege" that will convince any man that in such a he said she said he would have a fair chance."

Well it may not be male privilege, and I don't like the word privilege at all, but there are situations where a guy will be confident that if she said that he would have a fair chance. For example, if he were handsome, powerful and one of the "respected" or "cool" guys (depending on age group) and she is not, either ugly or really really ugly, or otherwise considered a person that "everyone knows he would have no interest in" such as a homeless person when he is not, or a WoC in a racist area, or an older smelly woman with teeth missing and he the younger of the pair, or a mentally impaired woman in a place where such women are not considered vulnerable but are considered undesirable and weird. Or if she has a reputation, and he does not, or has the opposite.
In any situations like that he may well confidently dismiss her empty threat.

Daisy said...

Danny, thank you for answering my question and being generally respectful. I appreciate it.

Danny said...

In any situations like that he may well confidently dismiss her empty threat.
Not necessarily. It is true that with the right connections (and I still say power plays a much larger part of the male privilege dynamic that many people are willing to admit) such threats could be rendered empty. However at the same time that same power can be used against that man as leverage. Despite what some women's activists might claim a rape charge (real or not but obviously there is no sympathy for the real rapists) can do serious damage to a man's career and reputation.


Danny, thank you for answering my question and being generally respectful. I appreciate it.
Any time Daisy.

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